Tuesday Tantrums

I HATE that I'm on break and I still have to get up every morning at 6:30 so I can get the kids off to school! I'm so tired and don't feel like I'm getting caught up on any sleep. I just want to sleep in ONE morning!!!!!

I hate potty training!! It is such a daunting task and it seems that once it starts, it has to be seen through to completion. It seems that there is a good day, followed by a bad. Yesterday was the first full day of starting Jacob with potty training. He did amazingly great and even told me a couple of times that he had to go. Today, totally different story. He told me 2x that he had to go, only it was after he had already gone. The good thing is that once we are done, we are done for GOOD! No more babies=no more potty training!!

On a different note, my biggest tantrum for today is about people who refuse to take any sort of responsibility for their actions or the actions of their families. I hate listening to people make excuses about why they are acting the way they do, why their children do they things they do and why they shouldn't be held responsible. It grinds me to no end!! Take responsibility. Stop blaming everyone or everything around you. Stop pretending that you don't have any options or that no one understands. Stop letting life make it's decisions for you and take control of your life and your actions.

Tantrum done....until next week!

The gods & fairies didn't show up!

This is an old blog that I wrote a couple years ago, but thought I'd bring it and post it here.

Ever have those days where you are made to feel like you just don't do enough? That you have sat on the computer all day and so you OBVIOUSLY have neglected everything. After all, the things that did get done, probably got done by some 'outside force'.Let's see what all we don't do as SAHM.

1. The laundry fairy takes care of all the washing (at approx 15+ loads a week). The fairy then makes sure it's all folded, put into drawers or hung up, socks are folded and everyone has what they need.

2. The food genie does all the grocery shopping and makes breakfast, lunch and dinner every day.

3. The school god gets up at 6:45 every morning, gets the uniforms out, kids fed, lunches packed, kids dressed and to school, not only on time, but early. He then picks them back up every day at 3:15, and goes back at 4:45 or 5 if they have an activity.

4. The homework helper makes sure that the kids get their homework done everynight and has it all packed back into their backpacks so they don't get into trouble.

5. The money tree sends out automatic payments to the mortgage company, car company, electric company and everyone else who wants money. PHEW, glad "we" don't have to deal with all that. EVERYONE seems to want money so I'm glad that the money tree takes care of all that for us.

6. Then there is the veteranarian who is here to clean up the dogs throw up and make sure the dog and cat are fed everynight and the cat liter box is cleaned out. The nurse is on call so that she can bandage every scrape, put ice on every booboo and kiss every pinched finger. The landscaper is here to mow the lawn and pick up the crap that is thrown from the white Explorer that so conveniently parks in the driveway and feels the need to clean itself out every morning, right onto the front lawn. The maid stops by daily to pick up all the toys, clean up the dishes after the meals, clean the kitchens, make sure the bathrooms are clean, and do the vacuuming. (Thank God for her...that job would suck!)

7.Then there's the nanny. WOW! What a job she has. Getting the younger kids dressed every morning, changing all the diapers, washing all the sticky fingers and faces after meals, helping to keep the potty training kids on track and not wet all day long and breaking up the fights that seem to happen almost hourly. Her job seems so stressful. Don't forget the baths that need to be given (that alone is an hour of time), teeth brushed and in bed between 8-8:30 EVERY NIGHT....always on time!

8.Let's see, the sex goddess. Yep, thank God for her too. We'd hate to think that when a husband comes home after a long days work that we need to have sex because he is stressed but horny. PHEW, thank goodness that all these other people take care of everything else so that if we wanted to have sex, we'd have the energy to actually do it.

Wow, these men are right...with all the help from the gods and faries, nanny and babysitter I guess we really DON'T need a break. Now, if they would show up just ONE time for their job, it might all be good.....

Not Me Monday

Today is my first "Not Me Monday". I did NOT laugh at my 3 year old son yesterday as he ran around the house, pretending to shoot his siblings, while screaming "You killed my wife!!!" I did not tell him today "Please do not put boogers on my phone". And I most definitely did NOT encourage him to put his new underwear on his head to try to encourage him to go potty on his new potty. Nope, that wasn't me!!

I did not sit at the computer and watch as my husband took out the window cleaner and cleaned the glass door. (Ok, so I did...and I enjoyed it!) I did NOT giggle everytime I told my son that he couldn't pee in his new "Woody" big boy pants (and I'm not STILL giggling even when I type it!) And I didn't encourage him to keep saying "Buzz Right Here" instead of Buzz Lightyear. SO CUTE, but I would NEVER encrouage improper words like that. ;)

I'm not the one who rolled my eyes when my daughter needed my help with her homework, knowing that she really could have done it without any help!!

And I most definitely did NOT encourage my sons to keep teeter-tottering excessively roughly, just so I could it on video. Nope, I didn't do it!!!

Such a slacker

I've been so bad with this blog, but I promise to do better!! I got caught up in the quarter at school and blogging just sort of fell by the wayside. I'm going to work on doing something a bit more daily though. Here's my plan....

Monday-"Not Me Monday". For this, I'm going to do all the "Not Me/I didn't do it" sort of things from the weekend. Just wait and see tomorrow. ;)

Tuesday-Tuesday Temper Tantrum. This is my place to rant and rave!

Wednesday-Wordless Wednesday

Thursday-Thankful Thursday

Friday-Friday Funnies. This will be the crazy, off the wall things my kids have said or done during the week.

Saturday-Serious Saturdays-HOPEFULLY this will be the things I've learned for during the week. Could be about parenting, might be about not taking myself so seriously, might just be something cool I learned at school. Who knows

Sunday-Sunday Simplicity. A place to post the Top 10s of the week. Top 10 things about me, about my family, about our life, about whatever Top 10 I choose for the week.

Parent Teacher Conferences

Does anyone dread this day as much as I do? Why is it that I always feel like "I" am the one being graded? I feel like I'm being graded on my parenting, how clean my kids are, how much I push them in school, their behavior, etc etc etc. With having 5 kids, each kid has a totally different personality, but a teacher in class only sees one kid so bases all their ideals about the family on that one child's performance and behavior.

I wake up this morning, absolutely dreading this day. I spent extra time in the bathroom curling my hair, doing my makeup and getting ready. "Put on your best face" is all I kept thinking. I had class today myself so went to school for a few hours then races back home to change into something a bit more classy (ok, not really....jeans and a cute sweater with a long necklace down the front, clunky black boots, adorable beaded bracelets that match my sweater). I check the mirror again. CRAP! Need some more style to the hair so quickly throw in a few more minutes at the mirror before I race to the school. Sunglasses are propped nicely on top of my head to add to my 'cuteness'. I'm ready!!!

Walking down the hall, I felt like I was going to the principal's office. The nerves were there. I know the kids are all good kids, and that they are smart, but there is still that "What if" playing out in my mind. This is the day that I may have to full admit to the world that I'm NOT SuperMom.

Teacher #1 greets me and we make small talk before getting down to business. All in all the conferences have gone well so far. 3 down 1 to go. I'm currently sitting at Panera, grabbing some lunch and preparing for my 4th conference of the day. This is the one I'm probably dreading the most!! It's the Middle School conference and my middle schooler has really struggled this last quarter. I believe that in the district we live in, which puts so much emphasis on performance in academics, that most of the parents probably do the homework FOR their kids. There is no way that the kids are doing some of this middle school work.

Question:

When you have parent teacher conferences, who goes? You or the kids dad? I can't think of a time that Tim has gone with me and I made the decision today that this is changing with the next ones later this year (if they have them). Why do "I" have to admit I'm that I'm not a super hero? I think it's time he joins my world....

I hate potty training

Jacob is 3 and probably should be potty trained by now, but I'm a realist and know that most kids REALLY aren't ready until about this age, unless of course you can take all day everyday for a few days in a row. Jacob is definitely showing interest, but he just can't figure it out. He'll all of the sudden yell "I have to pee in potty potty" and it's so cute. On Sunday I put some Tigger underwear on him and told him that he needed to keep Tigger dry. About 15 minutes later I hear him screaming "OH NO!!!" I ran up to the kitchen to see him standing in a puddle. I said "Oh no, Jacob. What happened??" He responds with "Tigger Peed!"

I found a journal entry that I wrote about a year ago. I figured I'd share it because I think so many can relate!

I have to the world's worst mom. I love my kids, I really do, but I don't always like them. Today is one of those days. The kids had me to tears tonight. The defiance, the disobedience, the screaming the fighting. All I could do was yell back. My patience was gone. My sanity, pushed to the brink. I was done! I wanted out! I tried so hard today. I got the girls lip gloss. I did their makeup. I played in the sandbox with Micah. I tried to do things with them to keep them busy and active and all of us being together.

A mom wants the perfect child. We look at them as a baby and have big dreams. dreams of perfect grades, beautiful looks, athletic, the works. We have the polite, well loved, obedient child with exceptional manners that amaze everyone. Pipe dreams? Maybe, but it's what we all dream of when we look at our small baby. As they grow older, they learn to push every button that we have. They smart off, argue, fight. They backtalk, scream, get angry. And we lose it.

We hate this side of us. We hate that we yell and scream back. We hate that we can't be the perfect mom who has all the answers on how to raise that perfect child. It's not necessarily the child though, it's us. If we could just figure out how to correct our children, point them in the right direction, and keep our cool while doing it, these stages would end quickly and we could all move forward. My anger pushed my children further. My screaming made their screaming and fighting first. I didn't keep my cool and that only made matters worse.

How can we become the moms we want to be? How can we have the child that we dreamed of? We hear that consistancy is the key, but when we don't know what that looks like, we don't even know where to start. Dr Phil often has moms watch videos of themselves, which leads to them breaking down and crying. Most of us don't have the option of seeing ourself on video though. So, start your day by looking in the mirror every morning. Talk to yourself. Give yourself a pep talk. When the kids get out of control in the afternoon and you feel yourself losing your mind, tell them you are going to your room for a minute. Take 5 minutes to again look yourself in the mirror and get your head on straight. I have a friend who is swearing by playing praise music in her house in the mornings while getting the kids ready for school, that they are much more controlled and things go more smoothly. That's my plan of attack for this week.

So, know that if you feel this way, that you love your children, but don't really like them, that you aren't a horrible person! You are a mom and you are normal. You aren't in this alone, but we can all become better moms through encouragement of each other. If you had ideas or help tips, I'd love to hear them. Leave me a comment!!! :)

School Closings

Georgia doesn't usually get too much snow, but tonight it's snowing and there is such an excitement in the air, despite the roads being totally empty. What makes this snowfall different than the normal once a year dusting of snow we get is that it is COLD-brutally cold!! The low is supposed to bottom out at 17* tomorrow morning at 6am, just in time to start getting up and getting the kids ready for their 7am bus pickup. The snow isn't going to melt like it normally does. This snow is going to turn to ice on the roads and since there are no plow trucks, no salt and a bunch of drivers who are too afraid to drive anywhere, I think it's going to be extremely slick. I've been pushing refresh on my screen every 10 minutes or so, waiting to see if the county cancels classes. Of course ALL the counties around us are closed, but not us. A friend had posted on Facebook about wanting her kids to have tomorrow off and another friend asked Am I a bad mom? I hated "A's" school being cancelled" (A is her daughters initial. I removed the name.) I decided this was a good topic for a 'normal mom' blog. HECK NO you aren't a bad mom!!!! More than likely I am the bad mom. I'm lazy and don't want to have to get up early. If the kids have school, that means getting up at 6:30am and getting 3 of them off to the bus by 7. Seth then will need to get up and finish his homework before going to the bus at 8:30. Yes, they'd be gone all day and I could get some much needed housework done (or even take a nap!!!) but sleeping in sounds heavenly too! The kids also missed a couple of days of school this week because they were sick and so have a lot of work to make up. By not going to school tomorrow, that will give them something to do during the day and they can get caught up. Yep, I'm probably the bad mom. My reasons for my kids staying home are pretty selfish ones, but that's ok. It's nothing an extra couple hours of sleep in the morning won't make me feel better about. Now, I'm off to check for school closings.....

Potty Training

I HATE potty training! Jacob turns 3 on Saturday and it's time, but he doesn't seem to realize that! He got new Thomas the Train big boy pants from Santa for Christmas and I was sure that would get him excited. Nope. He'll go sit on the toilet for all of about 30 seconds, proudly proclaim he's done and start to climb down. I tried today to make him stay there and tried to talk to him about what to do. I turned on water. We waited. And we waited. After about 5 minutes, he gets down and declares that he's done. I've done the whole timer thing where we go in there every 15 minutes but that doesn't work. I know all the lines of "He'll get it in his own time" but I don't like his time! I want it now, gosh darn it. Anyone have any amazing tips for potty training? You'd think that by kid #5 I'd have this down pat, but I don't. :(

My purpose

I've spent the last few days pouring over blogs by moms who appear to be "SuperMoms". I read some great posts, but they seemed to be so focused and organized. It left me feeling a bit down and like I'm not succeeding at this thing we call 'Motherhood'. My kids don't do all the chores around my house. Shoot, the majority of the time I can't even get the to make their beds or pick up their dirty clothes. I don't homeschool. I don't make everything from scratch or create perfectly well balanced meals. I didn't babywear or use cloth diapers. I WAS a stay at home mom until my husband and I decided to both go back to school to become chiropractors, and I have to say that I'm much more fulfilled now that I'm outside of my home for several hours a day. I used to say I loved being a stay at home mom and I didn't need to be outside my house, but once I actually discovered adult conversation and life outside the walls of my abode, I realized I really did need that part of a life. Spending the last 4 weeks off of school has left me excited and anxious to go back next week. My husband isn't the perfect model of dad or husband. He's human just like myself.

That said, we are both Christians, just trying to live a life that is God approved but not being ultra religious about it. We aren't into religion, rules or even guidelines of how our lives should be lived out. We are about a personal relationship with Jesus, and because it IS personal, you may never hear us tell you much about it. If you are in conversation with us, you will know we are Christians, but we aren't going to push it on you or even use "Jesus" or "God" in every other sentence.

I've read on all these other blogs about how the couples are 'allowing Jesus to guide how many kids they have'. While this may work for them, it's not for me! When Tim (my husband) and I got married, I had wanted 3 kids, he had wanted 8. After 4, we truly knew we were done. God DID surprise us with a 5th, despite us using "protection". I now have an IUD in place and can honestly say that if I have another baby, it IS because of God, not because of me just not caring what happens. I used to tell my mother in law that if God wanted me to have more kids, I could have my uterus taken out and I'd STILL get pregnant. I believe that God IS that big and capable. ;) I believe that while it's good for some to turn this area of their lives over to God, I also feel that God wants us to take responsibility for our families and our lives. I believe that God wants us to make responsible and wise decisions, and for me, 5 kids is PLENTY!!! (I WOULD like to adopt some day, probably when my youngest is about 7 or so.)

I'll share with you about my family in a later blog, but for now, I want to close by saying "WELCOME" to all the normal, everyday moms who are just trying to survive another day. To all the moms who dream of being a SuperMom, but their circumstances keep them from it. We are in this journey together! I know that you've read those other blogs out there that left you feeling you were incapable. I'm here to tell you "You aren't alone!!!" I hope you will visit me often and leave your feedback. As I get better with design, I'll (hopefully) add more to this blog. Until then, stop in and see me again soon!! I'll be here, trying to survive another day.